The Finding

Growth
The expansion from musician to artist
No one really knows what it takes
Thoughts of being stuck in pre-madonna
Quotes
The words from the mouths of others
Trying to confide in my own thoughts
Yet they seem to retain no colour
And I'm trying to find a new way
To metaphorically arrange
Organize my rationale on a simply complicated life
Because of pride in respect of my manhood
Refusing to wear my heart on a sleeve
On which everyday detaches itself to exemplify a new shirt a new feeling
Dressing the way you feel, I want to remain undetected
Phones calles received from day to day, emails and text messages
I want a new number to escape folks placing upon me a new pressure
But the new fad has become to speak on how you feel
After that's done, what's left to say to the one in who you feel something real
Somedays its really like this is going to work
Creating scenarios in environments, formulating like the flight of birds
Thoughts of the obscure
Conjugating a language in which is immensely the worth of dirt
Yet someone is going to seek the relief in someone who feels the same
And confides in what I find to be incomplete
Trying to find a back-wall to unleash my stress to
After so much build up the toll has me feeling completely out of loop
Completely out of sync, falling forever in this dream
The only scary thing is leading my self into a person
In whom I am not meant to be

Untitled Thoughts

When does it all get any better
Not that I'm complaining
But there's always a different direction to be stretched
Sketched and engraved by undying breed
Of a new me that wants to be better
Better is the enemy of the greater good
Yet I'm in search for a new quest
A quest leaving me in the flow of trying to be better than the best
Just to sit on top of a stress constantly digesting
The food for my thoughts leaving it all feeling complacent
One day I'll see it for all its mayhem
And all of these words will be reminiscent
Of coming form nothing to something
Like Jacob I climb that ladder
In which seemingly goes on forever
But forever is to infinity
Traveling from the negative to positive direction
Can't help but second guess it
But should I ever question it
So i'm building up a fortress
Leaving me without a homeland
Leaving me without the hope of
Leaving me to drown in my own love
Cause self pity can never be destructed
And her looks leave me disgusted
That such a beauty has to be mistrusted
Never to gain a new percentage
Never gaining any profits
But along always comes another princess
But am I a prince with a charm
Or an exception who is charming
I am no where near a king
That's a level that I don't want
I just wanna be a happy man
I just want a happy wife
I just want some happy kids
I just want a happy life
But happy sometimes comes at someone else's misfortune
A fortune is what I want, but wealth is the true fortune
So do I pick the girl who loves me
Or do I pick the girl who's greedy
Why can't I create a girl who is specifically designed for me
These are reasons I'm not God
I'm just his humble servant
But I always pray to God
To send that beauty that's a sweet as nice was
But the rain will always poor
But with the blessings come the storms
And this is the weight holding up my castle
Cause from this fairytale I awaken no longer a monster.